Cats

It is impossible to keep a straight face in the presence of one or more kittens.  ~Cynthia E. Varnado

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.  ~Dereke Bruce


If cats could talk, they wouldn't.  ~Nan Porter


There are two means of refuge from the misery of life - music and cats.  ~Albert Schweitzer


A catless writer is almost inconceivable.  It's a perverse taste, really, since it would be easier to write with a herd of buffalo in the room than even one cat; they make nests in the notes and bite the end of the pen and walk on the typewriter keys.  ~Barbara Holland


If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.  ~Mark Twain


Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia.  ~Joseph Wood Krutch


The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it.  ~Doug Larson


There is something about the presence of a cat... that seems to take the bite out of being alone.  ~Louis J. Camuti


As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.  ~Ellen Perry Berkeley


The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face whether they see a moth or an axe-murderer.  ~Paula Poundstone


Your cat will never threaten your popularity by barking at three in the morning.  He won't attack the mailman or eat the drapes, although he may climb the drapes to see how the room looks from the ceiling.  ~Helen Powers


When I play with my cat, who knows if I am not a pastime to her more than she is to me?  ~Michel de Montaigne, Essays, 1580


I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult.  It's not.  Mine had me trained in two days.  ~Bill Dana


If there is one spot of sun spilling onto the floor, a cat will find it and soak it up.  ~Jean Asper McIntosh


No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat, and no amount of masking tape can ever totally remove his fur from your couch.  ~Leo Dworken


A dog, I have always said, is prose; a cat is a poem.  ~Jean Burden


The cat is the only animal without visible means of support who still manages to find a living in the city.  ~Carl van Vechten


A cat improves the garden wall in sunshine, and the hearth in foul weather.  ~Judith Merkle Riley


I wish I could write as mysterious as a cat.  ~Edgar Allan Poe


Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later.  ~Mary Bly


My cat speaks sign language with her tail.  ~Robert A. Stern


Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel.  True, and they have many other fine qualities as well.  ~Missy Dizick


In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.  ~Terry Pratchett


Purring would seem to be, in her case, an automatic safety valve device for dealing with happiness overflow.  ~Monica Edwards


There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.  ~Author Unknown


Kittens can happen to anyone.  ~Paul Gallico


The cat is the animal to whom the Creator gave the biggest eye, the softest fur, the most supremely delicate nostrils, a mobile ear, an unrivaled paw and a curved claw borrowed from the rose-tree.  ~Colette


Prowling his own quiet backyard or asleep by the fire, he is still only a whisker away from the wilds.  ~Jean Burden


I don't think it is so much the actual bath that most cats dislike; I think it's the fact that they have to spend a good part of the day putting their hair back in place.  ~Debbie Peterson


To bathe a cat takes brute force, perseverance, courage of conviction - and a cat.  The last ingredient is usually hardest to come by.  ~Stephen Baker


Of all the toys available, none is better designed than the owner himself.  A large multipurpose plaything, its parts can be made to move in almost any direction.  It comes completely assembled, and it makes a sound when you jump on it.  ~Stephen Baker


No matter how much the cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.  ~Abraham Lincoln


Ignorant people think it is the noise which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain't so; it is the sickening grammar that they use.  ~Mark Twain


A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution.  ~Hazel Nicholson


Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet.  ~Colette


Who among us hasn't envied a cat's ability to ignore the cares of daily life and to relax completely?  ~Karen Brademeyer


A kitten is so flexible that she is almost double; the hind parts are equivalent to another kitten with which the forepart plays.  She does not discover that her tail belongs to her until you tread on it.  ~Henry David Thoreau


If a dog jumps into your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer.  ~Alfred North Whitehead


It's really the cat's house - we just pay the mortgage.  ~Author Unknown


Some people own cats and go on to lead normal lives.  ~Author Unknown


If I called her she would pretend not to hear, but would come a few moments later when it could appear that she had thought of doing so first.  ~Arthur Weigall


The cat is above all things, a dramatist.  ~Margaret Benson


A cat determined not to be found can fold itself up like a pocket handkerchief if it wants to.  ~Louis J. Camuti


Cats are smarter than dogs.  You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.  ~Jeff Valdez


If only cats grew into kittens.  ~R. Stern


If there were to be a universal sound depicting peace, I would surely vote for the purr.  ~Barbara L. Diamond

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