Hockey

Hockey belongs to the Cartoon Network, where a person can be pancaked by an ACME anvil, then expanded - accordion-style - back to full stature, without any lasting side effect.  ~Steve Rushin

By the age of 18, the average American has witnessed 200,000 acts of violence on television, most of them occurring during Game 1 of the NHL playoff series.  ~Steve Rushin


A puck is a hard rubber disc that hockey players strike when they can't hit one another.  ~Jimmy Cannon


Ice hockey is a form of disorderly conduct in which the score is kept.  ~Doug Larson


Half the game is mental; the other half is being mental.  ~Jim McKenny


How would you like a job where, every time you make a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?  ~Jacques Plante


Some people skate to the puck.  I skate to where the puck is going to be.  ~Wayne Gretzky


Hockey is murder on ice.  ~Jim Murray


Street hockey is great for kids.  It's energetic, competitive, and skilful.  And best of all it keeps them off the street.  ~Author Unknown


Hockey captures the essence of Canadian experience in the New World.  In a land so inescapably and inhospitably cold, hockey is the chance of life, and an affirmation that despite the deathly chill of winter we are alive.  ~Stephen Leacock


I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out.  ~Rodney Dangerfield


We get nose jobs all the time in the NHL, and we don't even have to go to the hospital.  ~Brad Park

Related Quotations:
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